WARNING: This page may contain sarcasm inappropriate for children under the age of 18.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

What kind of people do YOU work well with?

Friday I had a job interview as a paralegal at a bankruptcy firm, it seemed like a great laid back place, so I was pretty excited to get called back for a second interview. To give a description of this attorney would be pointless because he was definitely not your average lawyer, so I'm just going to tell you how many first place motorcycle racing trophies he had on the wall in the conference room. Five. I've never heard of an attorney who owned a motorcycle, god forbid racing one, and displaying the trophies in his conference room. That would go over great with a bankruptcy judge. "Your honor, we will have to delay my hearing, my attorney was driving his motorcycle home from the bar last night a bit . . . tipsy, he hit a telephone pole going 120. so yea, he's kinda dead"
But to get to the story;
Interview was going great, about 45 minutes in they asked me what type of people I clash with at work. I thought about it for a minute, and you have to understand, I felt like I had a pretty good read on his sense of humor, and he was a really athletic guy, so was everyone in the office. So my well timed response was something like, "grossly overweight middle-aged women with no sense of humor."
I would have kept going with the addition of "you know, the ones that come to work every day with at least 100 new photos of their kid, (also grossly overweight) and want to show you every. single. one. like "OMG LOOK AT THIS ONE SHES EATING A WATERMELON"
They both bursted into laughter, followed by him offering a little constructive criticism where he sternly looked at me, like my dad would after a campfire experiment got out of control, and said "yea I would NEVER use that in an interview again."
So I called them on Monday after hearing nothing, they said they had chosen someone else for the job. I'm okay with this though, I doubt it was because of my wonderfully articulated and honest comment, It was definitely because they thought that the tits on the blonde girl who got interviewed before me would be more of an asset to the firm.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Thank You, Segway.

Here is a bit of news that I find entertaining, mostly just because its a rich old British man dying in a hilarious ironic way, but also because it brings to mind a serious question.

Last weekend the CEO of the company that makes Segway's was out on a leisurely stroll, or whatever you call it when you're cruising around your 600 acre estate on your space age scooter, when he lost control of his segway and it careened off of a cliff into the raging waters of a river 80 feet below. Now, no one knows his motives, BUT, I think we can conclude that since there is no viral video of it on youtube yet that it was not meant as a publicity stunt for the company. I like to think the company was in the middle of a coup, as the CEO he was about to be replaced because of their horrible sales. This was his best idea of how to go out with a bang and simultaneously give a big F U to his mutinous board of directors. If it was an accident, then the last thought through his head was definitely; "why did I spend so much time inventing scooters instead of a jet-pack?"
But this got me thinking, coup or no, he died doing what he loved, riding his little scooter invention around his backyard.
I hope I live to be that long, and to make however much £160m is in REAL money, and I hope to die like he did, doing what I love. Which is the real reason for this entire post, I was just trying to find an excuse to put up this awesome picture.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Blogging away my virginity

So .  . . first time I've done this. I'm just going to get it over quick and go home so its not awkward.

I want to make it important and meaningful, so I'm going to write about something I'm passionate about.

My office has always had the kind of sticky notes where the top side of the stack of sticky notes is always the side that is sticky.

I went upstairs to get more sticky notes today, and now they only have the kind that alternate top and bottom being the sticky side. WTF Clearwire . . thats the end of all those marvelous cartoon flip books.